Cinnaman

Eureka! Dr. Jones' Family Practice and Pancake House

When you've got so many vexing problems on your plate, sometimes you miss solutions staring right up at you.

A case in point: Economists are wringing their hands over a Social Security/Medicare crisis looming when Baby Boomers begin retiring in a half dozen years. The emerging seniors will put a massive drain on the nation's health care system and where in heavens will the money come from?

Picture for a minute a huge medical waiting room full of seniors -- Q-Tips as our kids kindly call them -- sitting there for large chunks of time, getting more grumpy by the moment as they wait for federally-financed health care treatment. This is an economic problem? I think not. This is opportunity.

Because picture now a steady stream of seniors leaving the doctor's office and let your mind's GPS follow them to their next destination. Where are they going?

OUT TO EAT!

It is time for innovation, people. Yes, it is true that seniors will complain about even the teeniest co-pay they need to shell out to the doctor. But what do they not mind paying for?

EARLY BIRD SPECIALS!

Let's jump now to the medical office building of the future. Same facility, same large area full of well-seasoned citizens chatting about the grandkids and sources of fiber. But gone are the molded plastic chairs around the perimeter. They are replaced by café tables and chairs in a bustling new Health Waiterie.

That's right. Instead of wasting the time of these needy patients/customers, the new Health Waiterie dishes out food to seniors as they wait for medical service. Granola burgers. Tofu tacos. You get the picture. In fact, send along some suggested menu items.

So these health/food establishments dish out both pills and grub and take in what, students? Yes, More Revenue. National problem solved. There will be a quiz on Friday, so here is an easy study sheet.

The Top Benefits of the Health Waiterie Revolution:

6. While you've got the rumps in the seats, feed 'em week-old chicken and prosper

5. Control diet of non-compliant fatties with BP numbers higher than national debt

4. Roll BCBS co-pay charge into Early Bird bill and include salary hike for incompetent office receptionist

3. Experiment by sprinkling sedatives in Caesar salad and Viagra on fried oysters

2. Fatten bottom line by sterilizing utensils and endoscopes in same dishwasher

And the Number one reason for the Health Waiterie Revolution

Drug company reps will start showing up with fois gras-on-a-toothpick free samples

posted by Lou Antosh @ 9:58 AM